The Princess Paradox

The Dawn..

cindersmuses — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 07:47:04 +0000

I ushered in the New Year with love. Literally. I asked my B.D if he thought this would be a good year. His reply was one for the books. He says, “I ended the year touching you and started the new year with you. Of course it’s going to be a great year.” So sweet I nearly went into a glucose coma. Lol.

I’m hoping 2012 will herald the biggest addition to my life. I’ve started down a path that scares me, but brings me great joy and peace at the same time. I feel like i’m standing on the edge of a precipice, but instead of doom in the fathoms below, it’s mountains of colorful candy waiting to break my fall.

I’ve gotten plenty of mixed reviews. I’ve gotten the ‘ohmygod i’msohappyforyou’ and i’ve met with some resistance and some ‘tsk-tsks’ from my closest friends. Which is upsetting to say the least. But I’m not changing my mind. I’ve been in enough relationships to know when there’s hope and when it’s a lost cause. My gut instinct says YES and i’m sticking with my decision. I’m sorry that you all feel I’m not doing it the right way. But this is the right way for me, right now.

xoxo

Cinders

And so it begins..

cindersmuses — Sat, 31 Dec 2011 09:45:24 +0000

In less than 7 hours, we reach the year 2012. The year where some predict is the end of mankind.

Which leaves me to ponder. IF the world were to end in 2012, would I have any regrets? If I could, would I change anything?

After some serious thought, I can honestly say, NO. I wouldn’t change a damn thing. Not because every moment of my 2011 was fantastic. Truth is, quite a fair bit of it was horrible. BUT, they say everything happens for a reason. And I quite sincerely believe that if things didn’t happen in the sequence that it did and when it did, I wouldn’t be exactly where I am right now.

So I bid adieu to 2011 with a ginormous smile on my face. For I usher in the new year with a buffet of greatness in front of me. I have the love of a good man, the loyalty of my family, the promise of success and the possibility of offspring.

What more could a princess hope for?

xoxo

Cinders

Never Felt This Way

cindersmuses — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 16:24:14 +0000

by Alicia Keys (Words & Music by Brian McKnight)

There will never come a day, you will never hear me say
That I want or need to be without you
I want to give my all, baby, just hold me, simply control me
Because your arms they keep away the loneliness

When I look into your eyes then I realize
All I need is you in my life, all I need is you in my life
‘Cause I never felt this way about lovin’, no
Never felt so good, baby, never felt this way about lovin’
It feels so good

xoxo

Cinders

Xmas reflections

cindersmuses — Mon, 26 Dec 2011 04:48:05 +0000

This Christmas season has made me eternally grateful for my family.

This year, for the first time, I invited two of my closest friends and their partners over to enjoy the usual Christmas Eve madness at my home. Along with them came my new beau. All of which are not particularly used to celebrating this season with the same insanity I’m used to.

My parents, aunts, uncles and extended families did not so much as flutter an eyelash before welcoming these new additions into the fold. We carried on with our usual hullabaloo and made sure everyone was included.

I keep forgetting how very special my family is and how not everyone is as blessed as I am.

I know now. And I forever love and honor.

Xoxo
Cinders
Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

The Return

cindersmuses — Sun, 25 Dec 2011 16:42:30 +0000

Holy guacamole! I just realized its been over 6 months since I last blogged. Yikes! So much for my own personal post-a-day challenge. Massive fail.

So much has happened in this time. Some weird, some bad, some good, some just downright strange. But ah well. Such is the paradox of a princess’ life no?

I think I’m just going to give up on these posting challenges. I’m only setting myself up for failure.

I’m hoping with the way my 2011 seems to be ending, I’ll have more inspiration AND inclination to start penning my thoughts down again in 2012.

We’ll see.

xoxo

Cinders

58:No more words

cindersmuses — Mon, 30 May 2011 21:49:28 +0000

I feel like i’m at the end of my rope.

How did my life end up this way?

The only question running through my head right now is

I have so much love to give..

How come there’s nobody who wants it?

57:One and Only

cindersmuses — Mon, 23 May 2011 06:18:50 +0000

Adele’s music has some truly meaningful lyrics if you listen carefully.

You’ve been on my mind
I grow fonder every day
Lose myself in time
Just thinking of your face

God only knows
Why it’s taken me so long
To let my doubts go
You’re the only one that I want

I don’t know why I’m scared
I’ve been here before
Every feeling, every word
I’ve imagined it all
You’ll never know, if you never try
To forgive your past, and simply be mine

I dare you to let me be, your
Your one and only
Promise I’m worth it
To hold in your arms
So come on
And give me a chance
To prove I am the one who can
Walk that mile
Until the end starts

If I’ve been on your mind
You hang on every word I say
Lose yourself in time
At the mention of my name

Will I ever know
How it feels to hold you close
And have you tell me
Whichever road I choose you’ll go

I don’t know why I’m scared
Cos I’ve been here before
Every feeling every word
I’ve imagined it all

You’ll never know
If you never try
To forgive your past
And simply be mine

I dare you to let me be your
Your one and only
I promise I’m worth it
To hold in your arms
So come on
And give me a chance
To prove I am the one who can
Walk that mile
Until the end starts

I know it ain’t easy
Giving up your heart
I know it ain’t easy
Giving up your heart (nobody’s perfect)
I know it ain’t easy (trust me I’ve learned it)
Giving up your heart (nobody’s perfect)
I know it ain’t easy (trust me I’ve learned it)
Giving up your heart (nobody’s perfect)
I know it ain’t easy (trust me I’ve learned it)
Giving up your heart (nobody’s perfect)
I know it ain’t easy (trust me I’ve learned it)
Giving up your heart

So I dare you to let me be your
Your one and only
I promise I’m worth it
To hold in your arms
So come on
And give me the chance
To prove I am the one who can
Walk that mile
Until the end starts
Come on
And give me a chance
To prove I am the one who can
Walk that mile
Until the end starts

56:Turning Tables

cindersmuses — Tue, 17 May 2011 12:04:32 +0000

Close enough to start a war
All that I have is on the floor
God only knows what we’re fighting for
All that I say, you always say more

I can’t keep up with your turning tables
Under your thumb, I can’t breathe

So I won’t let you close enough to hurt me
No, I won’t ask you, you to just desert me
I cant give you, what you think you gave me
It’s time to say goodbye to turning tables
To turning tables

Under hardest guise I see ooh
Where love is lost, your ghost is found
I braved a hundred storms to leave you
As hard as you try, no I will never be knocked down

I can’t keep up with your turning tables
Under your thumb, I can’t breathe

xoxo
Cinders

55:Home cooked

cindersmuses — Mon, 16 May 2011 13:06:53 +0000

The one thing being alone has taught me is that I’m the only one I can count on.

Case in point? Being fed.

I had no dinner tonight. And the weather is cold and rainy and simply screaming for a stew. A hearty stew.

So instead of whining about how no one wants to take me out for stew, I attempted (for the first time ever mind you) to cook my own dinner.

Found a recipe online and decided to go for it. The results? Yummy in my tummy!!! I’m so proud of myself it’s beyond belief.

Now if only I could share my yummy stew with someone. *sigh*

xoxo
Cinders

54:”R” is for RECORD!

cindersmuses — Sat, 14 May 2011 10:01:22 +0000

Oh dear. It looks like my short appearance as a ‘button-head’ will never escape me.

For some reason I googled it today and came across this post:

http://family-fauzy.blogspot.com/2010/07/astro-byond-pvr-family-commercial.html?showComment=1305366992798#c7630674920428601701

Nice to know people enjoy the hours we spent stuffed into those heads. Lol. It was hot and sweaty and suffocating! Not fun!

For those curious, these are the faces behind the ‘heads’.

xoxo

Cinders